Counting Down with You by Tashie Bhuiyan

Author:Tashie Bhuiyan
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Inkyard Press
Published: 2021-02-24T14:20:42+00:00

29

T-MINUS 16 DAYS

I hate coming to community parties.

They’re worse with my parents around, but they’re bad regardless. The problem isn’t my cousins—or at least, the problem isn’t a majority of my cousins—but rather the adults.

There are dozens of brown aunties and uncles hovering over our heads, picking us apart with their eyes and turning us to dust with their words.

The only solace is the relatives I actually like. My favorite cousin, Fatima, is sitting next to me tonight. We’re at some fancy restaurant in Queens that looks out on a glistening bay, which I’m pretty sure leads into the East River. The restaurant hosts over a hundred attendees, and waiters dressed in blue walk around offering refreshments.

Fatima is a junior in college. Despite the four-year gap between us, we’ve always banded together in favor of the horde of elementary kids running around. The only rough spot in our relationship is how uneasy I become when we talk about her academic interests. She’s majoring in biology, and I’m almost positive it wasn’t her choice.

For a moment I consider asking her how it all went down, but I’d hate to recount any fight with my own parents, so I refrain.

“So what’d you get Sana?” I ask instead, nudging a piece of butter chicken with my fork.

Fatima sighs, resting her head on her hand. She seems uncomfortable tonight, continuously tugging on her heavy earrings. “What is there to get her? She already has everything she wants.”

I grimace. She’s not wrong.

Sana is every stereotypical brown parent’s dream come true. Since she was little, she’s always excitedly gone on and on about how she wants to be a doctor.

Now, a freshman in college, she’s actually on that path.

Admittedly, it doesn’t hurt that she’s fair-skinned, beautiful, and an only child. She plays by all her parents’ rules without complaint, and in return they dote on her endlessly.

I can’t imagine a life abiding by my parents’ standards, but Sana is obviously more than happy to do it. I guess it helps that most of her goals and views align with theirs, unlike the rest of us.

Out of respect and slight fear for myself, I avoid her outside of niceties. A lot of our relatives have suffered the consequences of befriending her; notably, my cousin Nabila, who confided in Sana that she was bisexual.

Sana went to Nabila’s parents and outed her. To this day, I’m still horrified Sana valued her parents’ rules over her cousin’s safety.

Nabila’s parents threw her out of the house—it’s rare for queer people in our community to be accepted with open arms, since it’s still illegal in Bangladesh—and none of us have heard from her since.

Or if we have, we don’t talk about it. It’s almost taboo to bring up her name.

It’s frustrating not being able to do more for Nabila. I’ve seen support groups for Bangladeshi queer youth on social media before, so it’s comforting to know that there is a safe space within our community, but it sucks that we can’t always count on our parents to be a part of it.

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